“You shouldn’t worry, it’s probably just a [insert medical jargon].”
I walked out numb, confused, unsure of what I was feeling. I pulled it together because the last thing I needed to cloud my dinner with my friend from college was a hypothetical medical diagnosis. We guzzled the night away—feasting on laughter and Atlanta’s finest vegan happy hour* while I crammed my questions, fears into a deep compartment, praying that they didn’t eke out in between sips of my lemon drop martini.
I’ve navigated my share of unexpected circumstances—some of them consequences of my poor planning. But this is different.
As I sit in this waiting area, in between a mammogram and a radiologist’s report, I’m grounded by a phrase I’m learning to cling to: be where your feet are. I’m cultivating mindfulness in therapy and the value in being present empowers me to reframe my experiences in light of what’s true her and now.
Worry casts fear and uncertainty into the future before you even have a chance to experience it. Regret colors the past with bleak hues, robbing you of the learning that can be unearthed from our lived experiences. What I’m cultivating is giving the presence the honor it deserves.
When navigating moments where the ground is wobbly, threatening to collapse under the weight and the waiting of the unknown, be where your feet are.
Right now, my feet are planted on the greenish gray carpet under black Birkenstocks and woolen socks.
My feet are planted in a family whom I love indescribably.
My feet are planted in friends who have been through both the highlights and the scenes that end up on the floor of the editing studio
My feet are planted in a faith that’s shifting between “what if” and “even if.”
I’m here. This is now.
Inhale. Hold. Exhale.
Note: all my scans came back “normal” so we’re all good. No big, scary diagnosis for me, but I’m sending love and prayers to anyone navigating uncertainty.
Talk to me:
Where are your feet in this present moment?
How do you stay grounded?
I'm glad all is well 🙏🏾
Ichigo Ichie: it roughly translates to every moment happens only once in a lifetime.
I love it, it reminds me to plug into the present.
I stay grounded, or try to, by accepting the fact that I’m what is wanted and needed in the world. That because I am still here, God is not finish with me yet. That’s keep a me 10 toes down.